kill me now

One of my friends really has been getting on my last nerve recently. I understand she has been going through a hard time, and I have been there for her—but the minute things go wrong for me, she doesn’t even care to ask if I’m ok..she just says I’ve been in a bad mood the past few days and that its making her be in a bad mood. I haven’t been a bad mood, I have been sick. Last night I woke up at midnight and had a massive migrane and was throwing up. They thought I was having a stroke so a group of paramedics came to my house last night and told me to go to the hospital. I was at the hospital until like five in the morning. I went in and out of consciousness, was throwing up nonstop, and just basically wanted to disinegrate—but was feeling so much pain I did not think that was possible. The doctors don’t know what happened, but they put an IV in me that injected a bunch of pain medicine and anti-naseua medicine-which helped a ton. I went to school today because I had a chemistry lab I really did not want to miss and I only really told people who asked where I was or if I was ok because I didn’t want to sound like a cry-ass. But I wanted someone(thing) to vent to because I just feel like since I have been there for her, let her come to my house when she has been crying and just talked to her about whatever she wanted, would drop all of my plans to make sure she was ok, and would text her all the time just to ‘check in’. Now that her boyfriend is in town, nothing else matters to her. When he leaves again, I’m not so sure I will have the heart to be there for her again, because true friends are there for eachother. Friendships are not one way streets and it really truly makes me feel like even more shit then I already feel just because the person I recently spent the most time making sure was feeling the best she could, couldn’t even care to ask why I was acting the way I was-and instead just called me a bitch and that I needed to stop being in such a bad mood. I am so sick of people, just when I think I have someone in my life that is worth putting the effort into making them happy I realise that they really, honestly don’t give a flying fuck about how I feel. People are so incredibly selfish and I hate it. I really do.